Mom Rage: The Everyday Crisis of Modern Motherhood (Hardcover)
A frank, feminist examination of the hidden crisis of rage facing American mothers—and how we can fix it
Mothers aren’t supposed to be angry. Still, Minna Dubin was an angry mom: exhausted by the grueling, thankless work of full-time parenting and feeling her career slip away, she would find herself screaming at her child or exploding at her husband.
When Dubin pushed past her shame and talked with other mothers about how she was feeling, she realized that she was far from alone. Mom Rage is Dubin’s groundbreaking work of reportage about an unspoken crisis of anger sweeping the country—and the world. She finds that while a specific instance of rage might be triggered by something as simple as a child who won’t tie her shoes, the roots of the anger go far deeper, from the unequal burden of childcare shouldered by moms to the flattening of women’s identities once they have kids. Drawing on insights from moms across the spectrum of race, sexual orientation, and class, she offers practical tools to help readers disarm their rage in the moment, while never losing sight of the broader social change we need to stop raging for good.
About the Author
Minna Dubin (she/her) is a writer and mother in the San Francisco Bay Area. Her writing has appeared in the New York Times, Salon, Parents, the Philadelphia Inquirer, Romper, The Forward, Hobart, MUTHA Magazine, and Literary Mama. She is the recipient of an artist enrichment grant from the Kentucky Foundation for Women. As a leading feminist voice on mom rage, Minna has appeared on MSNBC, Good Morning America, The Tamron Hall Show, NBC10 Boston, and NPR.
"With an appendix of concrete tools . . . Mom Rage provides much-needed advice, company, and consolation. It also offers a timely reminder that we might use our voices for more than bedtime stories."—Tanya Ward Goodman, Los Angeles Review of Books
“Few issues are left untouched in this thought-provoking book on a hot topic that is seldom discussed.”—Library Journal
“an original, eye-opening look at the rage that can consume mothers… This book represents a voice that belongs in every parenting collection."—Booklist
“a searing indictment of the failed systems of support and flawed narratives that too often surround parenthood… bound to resonate with any woman who has experienced the shift to motherhood as anything less than perfect.”—Shelf Awareness
“The author’s candid appraisal of her own rage . . . and her penetrating insights make for captivating reading. It’s an astute account of how society fails mothers." —Publishers Weekly
“A cleareyed analysis of the intricate web of cultural and political challenges that make female-identified parenting nearly impossible . . . the author writes with humor, vulnerability, and a level of expertise that shape her narrative into a nuanced and convincing argument for justice.”—Kirkus
“Mom Ragemakes crucial space for all of us who have experienced the sudden, terrifying urge to stab a mattress with a kitchen knife, punch a wall, or squeeze our children a little too tightly. Dubin reminds us our darkest moments are symptoms of systemic failings, not signs of personal flaws—and that our anger should be harnessed as an animating force for equity.”
—Angela Garbes, author of Essential Labor
“Mom Rage does an expert job weaving data and research to explain why moms are in crisis while also giving us thoughtful individual and systemic solutions.”—Eve Rodsky, author of Find Your Unicorn Space
“Breaking down the unnamable feelings so many women have as mothers, Mom Rage is a must-read for women who struggle to reconcile the cultural pressure to be 'good mothers' with the powerful negative emotions that come with parenting."—Soraya Chemaly, author of Rage Becomes Her
“If you've ever screamed at your child in ways that shock you — and we all have, haven't we? — Mom Rage is an absolute must-read. As Minna Dubin argues, your anger is not a moral failing. This book is an eye-opening exploration of the many social forces that drive mothers to explode at their children, as well as the societal and situational solutions that could, ultimately, save us.”—Melinda Wenner Moyer, author of How to Raise Kids Who Aren't Assholes
"Mom Rage is a critical addition to the literature of mothering, compassionately exploring the ugly, rageful moments that haunt many of us even as we struggle to do right by our kids. Dubin invites us to consider our rage in the full context of a perverse, broken, contradictory, and cruel American system that fails families at every turn. I needed the compassion of this book, as well as its expansive look of what parenting can and should be.”—Lydia Kiesling, author of The Golden State